Finish Strong

The message of the week in my class was a simple one:
Finish strong.

Six years ago, my daughter started taking tae kwon do.

A few days ago, she earned her black belt.

I think she got the message.
Osu*!

* Loosely translated, that's martial arts-speak for "you go girl!"

My New Year's Resolution

...is obviously not about timeliness.

In fact, I was going to give the whole resolution thing a miss.   Poor track record and all that.   But then, I made one anyway.

So it's clearly not about decisiveness, either.

It's also not about the things I should do this year*:

Eat healthier
Nag less
Re-evaluate the phrase "a good skin care regimen" to determine whether it could apply to me personally
Charge what I'm worth
Get some sleep

And it's not about the things that I shouldn't:

Check email while driving
Ever eat at McDonald's
Overcommit
Take my family for granted
Wear that sweatshirt with the holes in it out in public

Nope.  It's not about rightness or wrongness.
It is about an intention and a dream and a few very wise words from Mr. Berry Gordy, Jr**.

The first part, the intention and dream part, comes from the message of the week*** at my kickboxing studio:

Make a list.  A real list, that you write down and keep close.   On one side of the list are your intentions, your goals.  Specific, attainable things you want for yourself this year.   On the other side are your dreams.  Your wildest, craziest, biggest ambitions.  The pie-in-the-sky hopes that make your heart soar.   If you don't give voice to your dreams, you may as well not have them, right?  So let them fly!

The second part, the Berry Gordy part, comes from a talk he gave to the kids at my daughter's school in honor of Martin Luther King's birthday.    He told stories about his boyhood and his boxing days and his career in music and his friendship with Dr. King that had the entire room spellbound.    How hard it was for him to embrace the concept of "turning the other cheek", but how deeply he felt that to be at the core of the civil rights message that we were all celebrating now.  Towards the end, he said there was one great lesson he'd learned the hard way:

The secret to happiness is being proud of yourself.  To live life in a way that you feel good about deep down inside.   All kinds of people are rich and famous and miserable.  Other people have a lot less but they are full of joy.   Choose well.  Choose good.  Choose joy.

And so, I'm doing just that.  My intention and my dream and my resolution are all the same:

This year, I resolve to be happy.
I choose joy.   

What's on your list?

*I may do those things this year.   But I don't officially resolve to do them.
** Yes, that Mr. Berry Gordy, Jr.
*** This was actually the message of two weeks ago.  But I think I did already say that this wasn't about timeliness.  And I did manage to get it written down, so that's a huge plus.

Magnify the positive, shrink the negative and miniaturize the pecan pie

I have been trying for a while to become smaller.   Rather than taking the traditional approach of eating less, I've gone with the somewhat unconventional strategy of intermittent exercising combined with dining out, cocktails and frequent baking.    Thus far my method has not been that effective*, but it's been quite enjoyable, and I'm OK with that.  Particularly after hearing the message of the week in my kickboxing class today.

Magnified view of the tasty main ingredient

The idea was simple but perfect:  Magnify the positive, and shrink the negative.  Both are out there, but YOU decide what's important, and what you want to look for.   If you focus your attention on the good in life, in the people you meet, in  your work, in your family and friends, suddenly amazing things are everywhere.   Our teacher likened it to a google search.  You put out there that you're looking for ways to feel great, and that's what you get back.  Everything else is filtered out.  If instead you're convinced that LA is full of people who can't drive, you'll definitely run into an idiot around every corner**.   

I personally love this plan.  I've set my inner google to find delicious food, inspiring ways to exercise at least some of those calories right back off, and friends who think I look great just the way I am.   Positively brilliant.

As are desserts that come in packages small enough to enjoy without any exercise at all.

Mini Pecan Tarts

My mom first began making these many many years ago, and passed the recipe along to me***.  They are 100% guaranteed to impress the hell out of people.  Partly because they're adorable and elegant at the same time, but mostly because they taste so damn good.

3 oz. cream cheese, softened

1 stick (1/2 c.) butter, softened

1 c. minus 2 Tbs.  flour     

2 Tbs. powdered sugar

1 c. brown sugar, packed

1 beaten egg

1 tsp. vanilla

1 Tbs. butter, melted

about 1/2 c. of toasted pecan pieces

Using electric mixer or beating by hand, mix cream cheese, softened butter, flour and powdered sugar together to form a soft dough.  Roll into 24 small balls, just over 1 inch in diameter.  Press into bottom and sides of 24 mini-muffin tins to form crust.  Sprinkle crushed pecans on bottom of each cup.  (At this point, you can cover and refrigerate the muffin tins for a day or so before baking if you like.)   

Preheat the oven to 350.   Whisk brown sugar, egg, vanilla and melted butter together.  Pour into muffin cups until almost full.  Sprinkle a few more pecans on top.  Bake at 350 for 25 minutes, or until crusts are golden brown.  Allow to cool in pan for 5 minutes, then remove to cool completely.  

Click to print this recipe!

NOTE:  This recipe is made infinitely easier by two pieces of special equipment.  The first is a rather phallic tool called a tart tamper that lets you push down on the ball of dough to form a perfect crust.  They are about four bucks at Amazon.  You should definitely get one if you plan to be in the mini-tart-making line of work at all.   Mine is shown in this photo making chocolate mini tart shells.

The second helpful item is a plastic squeeze bottle.  I find that if I put the filing into a squeeze bottle and drizzle it into the tins, I have almost no drippy mess to deal with.    

* The best I can say is that I am somewhat more compact (i.e. denser) lately, due to kickboxing and the taskmasters at the Pilates place near my house.   In a remarkably unpleasant way, they pervert ordinary tasty food phrases into torturous exercises with spring-weighed pulleys.  I now want nothing to do with "catfish" or "scrambled eggs."

** Which was so weird because I had literally been surrounded by a sampling of the city's worst vehicular operators on my way to this very class.    Especially the slowpoke in the beat up Corolla in front of me on Magnolia.     I'm pretty sure I wasn't looking for him, but maybe he was sending out vibes about finding someone whose day he could ruin and found me!

*** I also inherited her mini-muffin tins, which have to be at least 25 years old and still going strong.

Paving the way

If you couldn't already tell from the ratio of cookie baking posts to those with uplifting thoughts from my kickboxing studio, I took a bit of a break from working out over the holidays. But nothing says "January" quite like hauling a bunch of extra pounds to class and trying to get them all off in one day. And nothing says "you're a delusional idiot" like the way your thighs feel when you try to get out of a chair later that night*. Sigh.

At least my fingers aren't sore. It would be a shame not to pass on this week's message about pre-paving your path through 2010. To paraphrase:

Now is the time to create a vision for how you want the year to go. Imagine yourself in December. What are your finances like? How's your relationship going? What's happening with your career? Your body? Don't worry about the how at the moment**. Go ahead and dream as big as you like. Put it all together, and that's your destination. Just setting that vision in your mind is like pre-paving a road*** that can take you there.

After all, you wouldn't just hop on a plane for vacation without knowing where you were headed. Why get up tomorrow without a direction for your life?

Cool idea, huh? I'm going to do some dreaming while I soak these aching muscles.

* Especially since there is a lot more of your thighs to hurt now.
** Pretty easy to see what's coming next week, though.
***By the way, make it a good paving job. Not like this guy's.

I do find I'm eating alone more with this schedule

My two favorite messages of the week from October so far:

1. "Smile at everybody."
It's either catching, or incredibly annoying*. Either way, you feel great.

2. "Get a bunch done by lunch, and you're a winner by dinner."
A fun way to remember that starting the day strong can make all the difference. Implementation of this one has been a little tricky for me. So far the only way I've been able to make it work is by having lunch around midnight.



* They were stressing the infectiousness of happiness. I added the alternative benefit of driving grumpy people crazy.

Making the most out of naked toast

About a week ago, I was dismayed to find I was down the last drop in the last jar of my homemade blueberry jam. I was staring at two pieces of freshly toasted cracked wheat sourdough bread, butter melting into the crunchy bits, with no hope of berry satisfaction. I nearly cried*.

But then, I remembered the message of the week from class: Think positive, act positive. You can go through life expecting the worst, finding fault, and making excuses. Or you can get up in the morning and decide to make the most of your day. Either way, you get out what you put in, so if you want results (and don't want to embarrass yourself by bawling in front of the open toaster oven), choose wisely**.

So I chose to rinse out that empty jar of jam and make some more***. It was positively delicious.


* I was already distraught about the appalling state of incivility in our nation's capital. My sister and niece had left town. My son lost his lunch box on the very first day of school. So you can see that this was pretty much the last straw.
** An important corollary is that these attitudes are extremely contagious:

• Protect yourself - Stay away from whiners and grumpy people.
• Spread the wealth - Share your jam, or failing that, be grateful out loud to someone today.

*** I made mixed berry jam using the same recipe as the blueberry jam, substituting a combo of strawberries, raspberries, blackberries and blueberries this time.

Uncommon Courtesy

The message of the week this morning in class was part of a "habits of excellence" series. The thought being that by consciously deciding to behave a certain way, and making the effort to ingrain that behavior, after a while it becomes integral to who you are and takes no work at all. It apparently takes 30 days to create a habit if you try. We've covered the habits of integrity, of perseverance, of setting goals and going beyond them. Today was the habit of courtesy: Saying "hi" to someone new, "thanks" to a partner who helps you out, "excuse me" when you need attention, and so on. Oddly enough, these small kindnesses go a long way. Especially when there's an overabundance of negativity and bad behavior all around*. So here goes.

To my husband, the best habit I ever formed in my life:

Hi!
It's so nice to have met you.
Thanks for being my friend, and for keeping me giggling all these years.
Please excuse all my annoying little habits and my more significant character flaws.
I really appreciate all those hugs, and the smile in your eyes when you look at me.
I'm profoundly grateful that you married me seventeen years ago today, and that the words we said to each other that sunny afternoon** have proven not only true, but wise and right and comforting beyond measure.
I hope to see you again soon. Like tomorrow, and each and every day after that.


* It's killing me how many of our friends are splitting up. But we did just go to a 50th wedding anniversary celebration, so there is hope.
** To love, honor, cherish and amuse, for all the days of our lives.

The Devil is in the Details

The message of the week in class today was "Pay attention to the details." I was inspired. When I got home, I noticed the following little things that might otherwise have escaped me:

The dog is overdue for a bath.
The clock in my car is running about 2 minutes fast.
The baseboards need dusting.
My daughter is missing.

I decided to pay attention to the recipe for peanut butter cookies instead.

Peanut Butter Cookies
Recipe adapted from the Magnolia Bakery Cookbook

1/2 c. (1 stick) of butter, softened
1 c. chunky supermarket peanut butter*
3/4 c. sugar, plus some extra for sprinkling
1/2 c. brown sugar, packed
1 large egg, room temperature
1 tsp. vanilla extract
1/2 tsp. almond extract
1 Tbs. milk
1 1/4 c. flour
1/2 tsp. baking soda
1/2 tsp. baking powder
1/2 tsp. salt
1 c. peanut butter chips, optional

Heat oven to 350. With an electric mixer, cream the butter and peanut butter together until fluffy, then add the sugars and blend until smooth. Add the egg, mix well. Then add the milk and the extracts. Whisk the dry ingredients together in a separate bowl, and then blend into the butter/sugar/egg/vanilla part. If using, now's the time to stir in the peanut butter chips. The dough will be soft. Drop by rounded teasponfuls onto parchment or Silpat covered baking sheets, leaving plenty of room for them to spread during baking. Using a fork (dip into a glass of cold water if it sticks as you're doing this), form criss-cross patterns on cookies, but don't flatten too much. Sprinkle cookies with a little sugar. Bake for 10-12 minutes, or until the edges are just beginning to turn brown. Do not over bake! Cookies might look underdone, but they are not. Cool on the cookie sheets for a bit, then finish cooling on wire racks.

* Don't use the goopy all-natural organic stuff. It's OK for the lunchbox at your granola school, but it just won't cut it in these cookies.

Trivia Quiz

Cheesy Pennies Trivia Quiz #1

Q. Which of these memorable lines from a classic 1984 film was also a prominent part of today's message of the week?*

1. "Why is there a watermelon there?" "I'll tell you later"
2. "Laugh-a while you can, Monkey Boy"
3. "Doomed is your soul and damned is your life"
4. "No matter where you go, there you are"
5. "Martians. In New Jersey."
6. "Home is where you wear your hat"
   
7. "Don't tug on that, you never know what it might be attached to "
8. "Take her to the Pitt. Go, Big-booty. Use more honey. Find out what she knows."

A. No matter where you go, there you are.

The lesson for today: Be present in what you do, and make the most of your time! Maximize the impact of your efforts by being 100% invested in what you are doing right now. If you are at work, be at work. When you're with your family, don't get distracted by the computer or your blackberry (guilty! guilty! guilty!). Step into the gym and stay focused on your training. You can pick up your worries about what to get at the grocery store or Obama's health care plan after class. With focus comes results. And perhaps, even recognition from afar:

"May I pass along my congratulations for your great interdimensional breakthrough. I am sure, in the miserable annals of the Earth, you will be duly enshrined. "

*Extra credit if you can name the film without clicking on the link!

That's funny, I feel like I need to go to bed

The message of the week today was "Resistance makes you stronger." If this is true, then mothers of pre-teen girls should be winning every Olympic medal that they have.

Inch by Inch

The wisdom of the week today at kickboxing was "Inch by inch, it's a cinch; by the yard is really hard." Tell yourself you're going to sit down and write a novel, and it may never happen. Put down a few words at a time, and you may find you have a chapter, or two. Lose 20 pounds in a week? How about a pound here and there for a while? Try to start high jumping with the bar at 6 feet? Right. But raise that bar a quarter of an inch at a time, and who knows? At a minimum, it's a lot less likely that you'll give up, and a lot more likely that you'll be farther along than you thought next time you look.

Ten Feet Tall and Bulletproof

When I started winding down my frenzied work life a while ago, all I could think was, "I'm a mess." As in, I'm a big old blob of stress. At the same time, my newly liberated self came up for air enough to notice how great my friend was looking. "How?" I begged. I had to know. Miracle drug? Botox? New husband? What? I'll do anything! (Not the new husband, but I was game for everything else.) Her secret was...kickboxing. Huh. Wasn't expecting that. But she looked really, really good. So I tried it.

It works. Something about the combination of the intense physical workout, the mental concentration, and the ability to hurl all the stress of the day into a mean right cross. Still old, but much less blob and much less stress. Better than botox any day.

This is a long-winded intro to the message of the week, which we all get at the end of class. I'm not normally a "self help affirmation" type of gal, but for a few minutes at least, I keep an open mind.

Here's today's: Be ten feet tall and bulletproof. Physically impossible, but it's an attitude thing. If you're above the roar of the crowd, you've got a great view of what lies ahead, and perspective on how to handle it. And the bulletproof part? Just think of it as "I am rubber, you are glue" for grown ups.